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Thursday, April 27, 2006
The Book is always better than the movie
I was emailing my literary leader friend, Kacey Kowers, who has an online website where he interviews authors, about how as readers we could write a book on the incredible things that people say who want to believe they are readers but don’t want to read. I told him some of my favorite stories of people who obviously had just seen the movie and not read the book. I thought I would in turn share some of them with you.
“I just finished Scarlett (the sequel to Gone with the Wind) and I just would like to know who that author thinks she is. All those kids and married how many times? Well, they just ruined what Scarlett had with Rhett in my opinion. Everybody knows that Scarlett only married Rhett Butler.”
Or after seeing a local production of the musical “The Wizard of Oz,” a woman next to me remarked,
“Well, that was quite an avant-garde production. I mean dancing skeletons, there were never any dancing skeletons. I find that a travesty.”
Or in asking a clerk at a major chain bookstore where “Midnight in the Garden of Good & Evil” was to be found. Now it was I believe it was at that time #1 on the New York Time’s Bestseller list and I had already perused the NYT’s shelves.
“What’s the author’s name?” without looking up from the counter.
“John Berendt”
“Can you spell the last name for me?”
“B e r e n d t”
“Is the book fiction or non-fiction?”
“The book is non-fiction and just happens to be on the New York Time’s Bestseller list.”
“Well, we don’t seem to have any copies in stock, would you like to special order a copy?”
“Do you know of the book, it is No. 1 on the New York Times list.”
“Ma’am, we get a lot of books that are New York Times and if we had to memorize them all, that would take away from out work. Hey, wait isn’t that a movie?”
Now here are three of my best stories as a bookseller.
A young woman came to the customer service counter to inquire on me helping her acquire some books. Her boys had outgrown their picture Bibles and she wanted to get them the HIV version now that they were older.
“HIV?” I inquired. “I did not know they made a Bible for those with AIDS, are you sure that is what you are wanting your boys?”
“No, I want the HIV bible, you know the New International Version.”
You can’t imagine how hard it was not to crack up when I told her,
“You mean the NIV version which would be the acronym for New International Version?”
“Yes, yes, that’s it. Well, you know what I mean.”
Or the time a woman came to the service counter obviously very distraught,
“Please, can you help me order a book?”
“Yes, what would you like to order?”
“The book that I loaned to my best friend who stole it from me and won’t give it back.”
“The title please?”
“How to Win Friends and Influence People.”
Or last, and this is the clincher, a woman called wanting to order a video of the real footage from the Civil War. Ken Burns had just had his PBS Civil War documentary airing and I inquired if that was what she meant.
“No, no, no, I want the actual filming of the Civil War, not the documentary. I want the real tapes, the real footage of the war on film.”
No amount of convincing would help her in believing that movie cameras or video film camcorders had not been invented at the time of the real Civil War. I would not deter her on her quest.
“I’ll just call a Hastings and see if they have it.”
And now a story on me where obviously I had not read THE BOOK. I was sitting in the family room of my school mates planning our 10th class reuninion. Suddenly my good friend Heidi read out of our Class of 1974 annual,
“For every thing there is a season, A time to be born, A time to die,”
I interrupted blurting out, “Who wrote that jibberish, oh my gosh, what a hoot.”
Heidi looked at me and stated, “Kathy, that is from the Bible.”
I assure you that since then I have read the Bible and will continue to do so. I also will tell you, save yourself the embarrassment, it pays to read the book. Even though I love to watch The Ten Commandments, Gone With the Wind, The Wizard of Oz, there is nothing like reading the authors’ words from the page. Besides, educating yourself can save you future embarrassments.
Case closed, these are all true stories. Maybe you all would like to send me your funniest book stories, I would love to hear them.
Tiara wearing and Book sharing, Kathy L. Patrick Founder of the International Book Club, The Pulpwood Queens Beauty and the Book 210 West Austin Jefferson, Texas 75657 www.beautyandthebook.com www.pulpwoodqueens@yahoogroups.com
P.S. for more on The Kacey Kowers Show, go to www.kaceykowers.com
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